That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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