Where did you get a picture of my penis
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So squirting runs in the family.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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