I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize