ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize