Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry assassin hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(479): View more from Arkansas

I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.

Fav 27 5453 1306
share tweet
(251): View more from Alabama

but she was nice to me.

(256): View more from Alabama

She was a fuckin STRIPPER.

Fav 25 2955 4265
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(904): View more from Florida

You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.

Fav 37 5011 1143
share tweet
(519): View more from Ontario

I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..

Fav 34 5928 1046
share tweet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(206): View more from Washington

My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed

Fav 19 4035 1547
share tweet
(774): View more from Massachusetts

I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.

Fav 7 1746 969
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(720): View more from Colorado

Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.

Fav 3 1149 639
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(919): View more from North Carolina

Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF

(1-919): View more from North Carolina

Spring cleaning

Fav 1 73 11
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(440): View more from Ohio

I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book

Fav 0 27 7
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT