Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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