Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
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So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
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I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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