If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize