dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize