Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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