I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize