nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize