you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
The uberlube is also flammable
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
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