i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
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