Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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