Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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