just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
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