She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
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I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
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God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
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