PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize