Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Randomize