I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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