eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
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when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
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Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
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