Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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