im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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