Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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