how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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