420 ftw
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize