Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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