Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize