Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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