dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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