I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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