i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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