if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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