Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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