he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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