So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
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