I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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