Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I forgot wine drunk hurts
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