Texts From Last Night

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  (845): View more from New York

  Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon

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  (845): Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon http://tfl.nu/pdkb
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way

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  (215): Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger" (215): i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way http://tfl.nu/i786
  Replies (16) Good night (2719) Bad night (736)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.

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  (917): I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina. http://tfl.nu/mdvg
  Replies (81) Good night (636) Bad night (9575) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.

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  (732): my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink. http://tfl.nu/ojx1
  Replies (39) Good night (1005) Bad night (3680) Order T-Shirt
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.

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  (615): He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat. http://tfl.nu/bfbd
  Replies (30) Good night (664) Bad night (4142) Order T-Shirt
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  (510): View more from California

  well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen

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  (510): well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen http://tfl.nu/tcr3
  Replies (20) Good night (602) Bad night (5186) Order T-Shirt
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.

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  (402): He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him. http://tfl.nu/b1lr
  Replies (8) Good night (3764) Bad night (1448)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context

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  (859): there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context http://tfl.nu/uw18
  Replies (4) Good night (2315) Bad night (826) Order T-Shirt
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  (509): View more from Washington

  God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number

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  (509): God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number http://tfl.nu/k3zo
  Replies (5) Good night (1979) Bad night (963) Order T-Shirt
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL

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  (201): I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL http://tfl.nu/z2bq
  Replies (7) Good night (1387) Bad night (351) Order T-Shirt
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT

  (440): View more from Ohio

  COME TO THE BLANKET FORT

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  (440): OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT (440): COME TO THE BLANKET FORT http://tfl.nu/1mvf
  Replies (4) Good night (1206) Bad night (501)
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  (415): View more from California

  Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.

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  (415): Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity. http://tfl.nu/w288
  Replies (4) Good night (804) Bad night (334) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."

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  (512): You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid." http://tfl.nu/wv53
  Replies (4) Good night (1598) Bad night (280)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.

  (256): View more from Alabama

  They have marijuana tests too!

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  (256): Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know. (256): They have marijuana tests too! http://tfl.nu/avoj
  Replies (9) Good night (1004) Bad night (230)
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  (662): View more from Mississippi

  You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".

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  (662): You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,". http://tfl.nu/dg58
  Replies (8) Good night (368) Bad night (568)

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