I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
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