If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
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