I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
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