I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Someone signed my nipple.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize