areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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