Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Randomize