It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize