i wish starbucks made bloody marys
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize