i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
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best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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