No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
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apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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